Friday, September 25, 2015

Five on Friday: Boundaries in Marriage

Guess what day it is, friends? Friday (happy dances all around)! This five on Friday looks a little bit different! Through my involvement in a blogging group of Christian women called The Peony Project, I was given the opportunity to do a guest post for a series called Marriage 101 on a beautiful blog named His Endless Love. Needless to say, I was so so excited to be involved. I put in my preferences for a post and waited to see what I'd end up with. I think it ended up being a great, challenging topic. Check it out. 

Photo: Lacey Rene Studios 
What is it about the idea of “boundaries” that often makes us think we’re missing out? Ever since the days of Adam and Eve, we’ve had it in our minds that somehow a boundary, which was put in place for our protection, was holding us back. Like a kid in the kitchen who’s upset with their mom for not letting them touch the hot stovetop, we continuously trick ourselves into believing that maybe whatever is out there can’t really be that bad….right? Time after time, our best intentions to justify our actions lead us to lots of trouble. In fact, this approach can be deadly when it comes to marriage.
Photo: Lacey Rene Studios


While we were dating, my husband recommended a book called The Best Question Ever to me. In the book, Andy Stanley challenges us to ask this question in every situation, “What is the wise thing for me to do, in light of my past experience, my present circumstances, and my future hopes and dreams?” Stanley talks about fool-proofing your life by being prepared and making decisions that help you avoid regret. Though he mentions topics like jobs, finances, and even your calendar, the chapter on relationships particularly struck me. Most people don’t really plan to have an affair, but they don’t always plan not to either. This made me think about things in a new way. Just because my hubby and I are taking precautions and setting boundaries doesn’t mean that we think our marriage is going to fail, it just means that we are willing to go above and beyond in order to be proactive and protect it.

To see my five boundaries to help protect your marriage, head on over to the full post at His Endless Love! I hope the points I share make you think and bring strength to your marriage. Have a wonderful, blessed weekend.

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30 comments:

  1. I love it! Thank you so much for sharing!

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    1. Thanks so much! I hope you have a wonderful weekend!

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  2. "Just because my hubby and I are taking precautions and setting boundaries doesn’t mean that we think our marriage is going to fail, it just means that we are willing to go above and beyond in order to be proactive and protect it."

    YES! Absolutely Yes! I love this so much. A marriage is a sacred, living thing that needs to be nurtured and loved and protected. Thank you for this; I will take it to heart!

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    1. Thanks Vicki! I totally agree- just like any other living thing, it needs protection and to be poured into. I love the way you worded that! Thanks for commenting and sharing your wisdom :)

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  3. Thanks for linking up! I'm not married yet, but I'll definitely be checking your post out!

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  4. So much truth here! Setting up boundaries doesn't always feel like a "fun" part of marriage but it's so essential to keeping our marriages strong and healthy. Thanks for sharing, Kelsie!

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  5. So true about taking precautions, that doesn't mean you are planning to fail that just means you are being wise and want a successful relationship.
    www.thenannysaga.wordpress.com

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  6. Interesting point of view! Thanks for sharing. I wouldn't have thought of boundaries this way.

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    1. Thank you Amanda. Getting the topic for my post definitely made me think as well!

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  7. I absolutely love this. Boundaries are important in any relationship, especially the one between husband and wife. These are great tips. The only thing I would add is "never do anything you wouldn't feel comfortable with your spouse doing." It's one my husband and I stick to and it's helped tremendously in our first year.

    Best Wishes,
    Allison Jones
    www.livelifewellblog.com

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    1. Thanks so much, Allison! I LOVE your point! That is such a great one. I agree- we need to always consider our spouse's comfort!

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  8. Oh I love boundaries and I love the way you reminded us of their importance in our marriage. ��

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  9. One of the things that my husband and I agree on is that our marriage comes first, and if we are being asked to do something that doesn't put our marriage first, then it's out. I tell him all the time that I waited a really long time for the right person to come along (I was 36 when we got married), and that my first marriage would be my last - I'm in this for the duration, and that means that I treat our relationship like the very valuable thing that it is.

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    1. Yes, yes, yes! LOVE it. I am right there with you. Thanks for reading and for sharing your knowledge!

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  10. I am so glad i've run across your site; I found it on amy milic's friday's linkup. Not being alone with a member of the opposite sex is SO important, but unfortunately I've been accused of feeling that way for reasons other than prevention. None the less, THANK YOU for sharing. You are a fantastic woman; I can feel it!

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    1. Thank you Kaitlyn! I'm so glad you stopped by. I can see where others may want to think a certain way based on your boundaries, but I think we all know deep down that others don't always have our best interests at heart in the way we do. Thanks for reading, and for your kind words- they mean so much!

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  11. This is full of so much wisdom. I love the concept of being intentional for the betterment of your partnership, and I think that's something a lot of people could really learn from.

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    1. Thanks, Kayla! I love the way you worded that!

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  12. Kelsie:: I started my marriage at 19, and wish we would of started with these. And too not because I thought it was going to fail, but because it's important. :)
    Thanks for linking with #LFEO :)

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    1. Thanks so much, Amanda! I've sure you've learned a lot over the years. Thanks for reading!

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  13. Hmmm...

    From the title, I thought this article was going to discuss boundaries within a marriage. It seems to acually be focusing on boundaries around a marriage.

    I think both are important...and somewhat related.

    It absolutely makes sense to be intentional in our relatonships.

    Thanks for sharing!

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    1. Thanks for reading, Joe! I agree, they are definitely related.

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  14. Wonderful food for thought! It can never hurt to be proactive, especially when it comes to guarding our hearts and marriages.

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    1. Thank you, Alecia! Agreed, guarding our hearts is never something to take lightly!

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  15. I'm going over now to check it out. Stopping by from Tuesday Talk. Following on Pinterest!

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