Today I popped into my school to prepare for the extended flexible learning that’s starting. While other teachers had done some precautionary packing prior to the start of Spring Break, I had to run back into the eerily quiet, regularly bustling building. Most of my teaching materials are online anyways, but I’ve been on maternity leave since January 8th and wasn't planning to be back yet, so there were a few books and binders I needed to grab to make sure I can make it though. Potentially through the rest of the year. And when I got there, I was caught so off guard.
My room was completely empty. So were nearly all of the other rooms I saw. Desks and chairs littered the hallways. I had to search to find my bookshelves near some lockers. Books were in boxes, but pens and sticky notes still scattered the top of my desk like remnants that weren't intended to be left behind. It was weird. It left me in a bad head space. Emotions and worries started to bubble up. But then a sweet conversation with my janitor, who was there doing the deep cleaning, made my mind shift.
As we venture into this new "normal" for as long as we have to, I am realizing that I must again and again choose grace. Grace for myself as a teacher, and the expectations I have for my Gifted and AP kiddos (especially with a 3 yr old and 2 month old at home with me). Grace for my students, many of whom are now babysitting their siblings on top of their own high school studies- proms, graduations, so many things up in the air. Grace for the parents of these students, who are likely trying to help their kids navigate this new world while dealing with their own work, or lack of it. And I sure hope they'll give us teachers grace too.
Grace for my own babies, as they have absolutely no idea what's going on or why we're stressed or we can't do certain things we used to outside of our house. Grace for my husband, as we enter this season of both of us working from home, caring for two little ones, and not really seeing any other adults but one another.
This is what so many of us, really all of us have to choose in this moment. Grace for our government leaders who are making choices they never dreamt they'd be making. Grace for bosses and administrators who are doing their best to keep things afloat while caring deeply about our health and safety. Grace for people who have breakdowns or need support with tough job situations. And honestly, grace for ourselves. Our world has changed A TON in about a week, and we're all having to let go of selfish desires, to do lists, and our plans- all for the greater good. It is challenging and yet, oddly purifying. We will make it through, and in the end, I certainly believe we will come out stronger and more appreciative of all we typically take for granted. There is little we can control right now, but we do get to control how we choose to deal with our current challenges.
Choose grace.
Currently,
Kelsie